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Confused about almost everything...

User Thread
 34yrs • M •
jhenning1214 is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
Confused about almost everything...
I'm new to this site so forgive me if I don't post exactly according to the rules because I don't know them, but I have been reading some posts and I really like the insight some people have been able to give.

I recently (meaning last night at midnight) was broken up with by my girlfriend of a year and half. She said her feelings began to change about a month ago and she felt as if she loved me but was not in love with me.

In order to get some accurate feedback I'd like to give you some insight into my life. I hear all the time I'm the "perfect" kid. My girlfriend told me I was the "perfect" guy to marry, but not the right guy right now. I have always lived my life according to other people's advice. I wasn't the person that challenged educated people when they said don't do drugs, I believed them. I am currently 19 years old, a college soccer play, 4.0 gpa, and have never smoked or drank in my life. I don't mean to brag at all, but I feel like all of the effort I have ever put into life is meaningless. I have always tried to do what I believe is the "right" thing to do. Since last night, I feel like the only thing that happens when I feel like I'm getting everything right is that everything has the ability to go wrong. I don't understand why if I am seemingly doing everything right, the girl I love and my motivation to get up and go to class everyday has left me. Does god really want to test people and push them to their limits to determine how strong they really are? I have heard that before. Hearing it makes me think, "Well, if I start to succeed then I will have it taken away to be challenged." And thats not fair. I've heard life isn't fair. And if life isn't fair then what is the point of it.

I'm going to go ahead and end my post here. Hopefully I have conveyed at least part of my mental battle that I have going on and literally any insight i greatly appreciated. Thank you

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 34yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that gazbollokface is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Okay, Welcome and all that.

This situation of yours is just another one of life's many test that we all have to endure at one point. In my personnal God-less opinion (Except Odin), It seems that this is just one small Karma fart!

Everything is going smoothly for you until one thing kicks you in the knackers! Then it all SEEMS to go to crap but the trick is to continue with your lessons, keep that GPA at it's best, and if after she's sees how successful you've become still doesn't want to know you, move ahead and lead your life like you've always wanted to.

Your purpose will come soon enough, I may only be 19 myself, but I have had as much experience with the world than any man triple my age!

I have no idea if any of this is helping but keep it in mind that one dame may steal your heart and rip it apart, but in the end, she will see who was wrong in the end.

Maybe a little bit of booze might help you overcome it too, or it will make you into a wreck!

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"People like me hate people like you!"
 34yrs • M •
jhenning1214 is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
People I keep talking to keep telling me that is one of God's test and it will make me better in the end and stuff like that. I guess I just have a hard time believing at the moment that this somehow is gonna make things better. Fate also kinda gives me some trouble

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 36yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Jacker_Jones is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
I don't really believe in God I find it's a way to shift the blame away from oneself.

Losing a loved one is a tough emotional task, to feel emotionally unstable is normal or human.

The problem with having everything go right is that when things go wrong you are more crippled than someone who has things go wrong all the time. Emotion is like a drug the more emotion you feel the more of a tolerance you develop towards it.

I would start trying to date new people. In my asshole opinion, anything goes when it comes to hoes. Girls are a great mystery and again in my asshole opinion I don't know what the mystery is and I don't want to know because I have better things to worry about. For some reason I believe its better to just let things happen just wait for a girl to show interest in you and hit that shit haha Forget about this girl because she's a bitch

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"I love to see people struggling for their purpose in life..."
 33yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that zachf is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
I believe its better to just let things happen just wait for a girl to show interest in you

Agreed, so many fish in the sea. Just find one who appreciates you and your ambition. You two may get back together, but let it be because it was meant to be not because you forced it.

Loosing someone hurts and sometimes having them there for so long can make it even tougher to admit that they're even gone. Eventually you'll face the facts and it'll hurt like mad and in my experience the pain numbs but always lingers. I've learned to accept it but sometimes it takes awhile to really "get over" someone.

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"Whether we wake or we sleep, Whether we carol or weep, The Sun with his Planets in chime, Marketh the going of Time. -Edward Fitzgerald"
 46yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ironwood is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
A lesson I see you may wish to take from this is, Do you really want your life's sense of "purpose" and meaning to rest on the shoulders of someone who can just choose to walk away from you?

Do you really want your sense of love in life to be dependent upon others?

How about love life.

Do you really want to label that experience as love? One where so much blind dependency has turned into pain and self pity.

This could be your opportunity to discover what love truly is and realise that the common perception of the term is dysfunctional and damaging.

Try loving yourself, and not your achievements, for starters. Then perhaps try loving a stranger with no intention of compensation or reciprocation.

Love is meant to be given and recieved freely and widely, not focused on one demanding person trying to horde it and dominate you through your "exchange" of it.

A lady who truly wishes to be in a loving relationship with you will want you to do what you want to be happy, not to do what she wants to make her happy.

And if you want the same for her, hard not to at that point, you will find you either want to do things together, or not, but that you are both happier because of it.

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"The Greatest Enemy of Knowledge is Not Ignorance, It is the ILLUSION of Knowledge. Stephen Hawking"
 36yrs • M •
organic machine is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
does not smoking or drinking or not doing drugs makes a man perfect? the question is you to answer.may be your girl had a different meaning of being perfect and now she is searching for someone more perfect

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"i exist because i am not dead"
 70yrs • F •
birdsong is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
i am confused about almost everything. i do not understand people, money, war, the economy, it all confuses me. am i supposed to participate in all these things that confuse me. am i supposed to have friends, when they just confuse me. mostly people confuse me....your friend one moment then poof. pettiness...do not understand,,,rudeness...what for ? i am very confused

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"why look for answers when you can look for joy"
Confused about almost everything...
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