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just a question..

User Thread
 37yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that JoelB is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
just a question..
So I just wanna take a little poll type thing here.. I'll give you a little insight to my situation first. So I've been somewhat "seeing" this girl for a little over a month probably, we've known each other for I don't even know how long, probably since like 8th grade (20 now), and she lies like NO other, about where she has been, what she's doing, just dumb shit all the time. For instance, she claims she had to go over to this guys house for HIS little brothers birthday dinner, she left at about 8, which is past dinner time anyways, and said she'd be home an hour later... it is now 12:44 and she isn't home, nor is she answering my calls. And I'm just calling her excuse right now is gunna be "Oh i went home and fell asleep".. hahaha so I'll tell you all what she says tomorrow. Now, I know shes lieing, but I've just been putting up with it because shes paying for our little trip to Chelan for memorial day weekend, buying all the food, booze, campsites, everything. Now after the trip, I plan on just being like "SOooo, you're full of shit, I know it, have known it for a while... peace out" lol. SO on a moral ground here, who thinks its wrong of me to do that? Hahaha.. I feel like I'm using her but at the same time... well she's full of crap... so I think it evens out.. lol. But I'd love to hear what all you have to say about it, we have some pretty polor opposite personalities on here so I think it'll be funny to see what some of you think...

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"Aint flashed a smile in a long while...."
 37yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that JoelB is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Well, It's not like I got into the whole situation just for the chelan thing, it just sort of came up a couple weeks ago... and I figured I'd just stick it out until afterwards. I see nothing wrong.

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"Aint flashed a smile in a long while...."
 35yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that ChokingV is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
after being with a few girlfriends who have been either total bitches, or complete liars, or both, i gotta say, go for it. in the end it's almost like a "taste of her own medicine" thing. although if i were you i would confront her about it and give her a chance to fess up to whatever she's doin before you completely break off.

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"i don't like the idea of "nothingness", it makes me anxious"
 33yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that BillyNoMates is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
hahahahaha wow thats a difficult one though eh? Hmm... you could go with her to this trip...or ...dont...

I say go...and take a camera...and then bring the camera with you when you are just about to tell her what a little lying whore she is...

Should be funny...

THEN

post the pictures on here so we can all see lmao...just kidding lol.

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"Jingle ALL the way!"
 37yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that JoelB is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Hahaha, yep I talked to her this morning and she tried to tell me she didn't even go, and ended up falling asleep on the couch.... hahaha.

And as for confronting her, I do confront her everytime about it, and she just argues with me and tells me I'm wrong... she makes a pretty strong argument... not. So I'm always like OH OKAY then where were you? And she all stutters and tries to makes excuses... worst liar ever. haha

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"Aint flashed a smile in a long while...."
 40yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Wyote is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Tell her you know what's really going on before the trip, but then refuse to discuss anything until you get back. That way she'll feel awkward the whole time and may end up making random confessions.

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"A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. - Thomas Carlyle"
 34yrs • M •
Tao is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
quote:
I do confront her every time about it, and she just argues with me and tells me I'm wrong... she makes a pretty strong argument... not. So I'm always like OH OKAY then where were you? And she all stutters and tries to makes excuses... worst liar


Hey Joel, I've got no moralizing for you here, but just wanted to ask you this question: How would you feel if when you confronted her, she answered you like this: "look I just like to go out sometimes and fuck a lotta guys. And you're just one of my playthings. So look sharp baby, at least you're the one getting the weekend away . And so you better cheer up and make sure you're worth it!'

What would you say to this?

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 42yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Chained Wings is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
You seem like an ok guy Joel B and what I say is not against you. Just how I see it. I dont think you are going to like my opinion, but, you did ask for it.

First of all you say you have no problem with what you are doing. But at the same time you are asking people what they think. So its clear you are having some kind of moral dilemma or you wouldn't even be interested in what others believe right or wrong.

Second. Honesty to me is one of the most important things in my life. Its a cornerstone of who I am. Therefore I believe all relationships; friendships, work, sexual etc. MUST have honesty as a foundation, or they dont work.

So here you are, getting into a relationship with this girl who you have known since she was a child. You must know the sort of person she is. So you knew BEFOREHAND that she was going to dick you around when you decided to get into a relationship with her.

Now you are complaining that she's possibly cheating on you and that her lies and deceptions make you hurt enough to feel using her and then dumping her is justified.

I would have to say based on the little I know of this situation, you have let yourself get into it knowing it wasn't going to work out. And so you are just as bad as she is if you want to post about her faults and act like her too.

This relationship hasn't gone on for very long and since you knew she's a liar and probably knew she would sleep around then you probably weren't looking for a long term thing. You would have to be a total tard to think someone like her would be the one you want to settle down with.

So Im assuming its mostly a casual sex thing and isn't very serious. You're getting sex, she's getting sex and now you're getting a free trip.

You shouldn't complain.

I personally couldn't stomach such a shallow relationship. And knowing or even thinking she had cheated on me I would have to confront her straight away. To hide it and play her games so I could get a little more sex and a free trip with the knowledge I was going to screw her over at the end, would make me loath myself.

Once again that's just me. I think you know where you stand and she knows where she stands. Both of you are getting some cheap pleasures from this relationship.

This makes me wonder why you are posting this.

Posting here about her being the bad one and you feeling that its a good thing to do what you're about to do isn't really helping you gain absolution for your actions.

I do hope the reason you posted here was that something good in you felt bad about the whole thing and you wanted to gain other views on how you should deal with this problem, even if you couldn't admit it.

Its obvious you aren't planning anything serious with her and you want to dump her in a couple of weeks. Therefore you aren't happy with your current romantic life and this is perhaps you subconsciously trying to find what your heart TRULY desires and how to achieve it.

Im sorry if it feels Im picking on you. I hope that what I say isn't seen as criticism. But what it is. My opinion on your situation.

Perhaps you just caught me at nasty time with my own relationships, and my anger at men who play the game and justify it by looking for faults in their partner as a way to keep playing that game.

And I hope what I said makes some sense and you find it in you to do some introspection on what it is you are looking for and where you want to be headed. And that integrity is the best way to act in any relationship, not stooping to her level.

Or oneday someone will be posting about you being full of it and only worth using and dumping.

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"When I was a child I flew! Then as an adult- I watched others soar."
just a question..
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