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Divorce

User Thread
 57yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Dreamer is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Divorce
Anyone ever been through it, here?

Good or bad?

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"Even though is difficult, I can still dream."
 57yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Dreamer is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Pardon. Should have finsihed. Good or bad idea?

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"Even though is difficult, I can still dream."
 57yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Dreamer is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
What circumstances would be an ok reason for divorcing?

I know this is NOT a usual topic, so I decided to shake things up.

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"Even though is difficult, I can still dream."
 40yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Wyote is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
infidelity... thats about the only reason i can think of, anything else can and should be worked through. but im young, what do i know?

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"A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. - Thomas Carlyle"
 57yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Dreamer is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Abuse is another reason.
In that light, there are a few cases of abuse, such as physical, emotional, and mental.

Infidelity is one, but can it be prooved? How do you proove it?

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"Even though is difficult, I can still dream."
 40yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Wyote is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
ah yes, abuse. i knew there was something else. i suppose proving infidelity is extremely difficult - unless your significant other video tapes themself 24/7 - even then you would have to watch all of said tapes, and thus have no life of your own. but i think before even going in to marriage, you must know this other person to such an extent that you would recognize a change in them when something like infidelity occurs. addressing it and addmitting it to yourself is the difficult part. perhaps knowing someone to that extent is impossible though. in which case you can only hope that your partner would feel so guilty and bad about doing such a horrible thing that they would simply come right out and tell you. trust, honesty and communication - if you have these things, you will know if/when infidelity occurs.

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"A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. - Thomas Carlyle"
 47yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that pv_emerald14 is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Other than catching the person red handed that is cheating there is another way besides video taping to catch them. It costs but it works and there's no way of disproving it. Could have the person investigated by a PI.

Having been through a divorce, it can be good and it can be bad. Not just for the kids but for you and/or your partner. Staying in a marriage can be bad though also depending on the situation. For instance, if there is any abuse of any sort, if you are constantly fighting and can't stand each other anymore can be bad. Most ppl don't think of how staying in a marriage, where there are kids also, it affects the kids. I have a sister who grew up with parents who stayed together just because of her and one of my brothers. They are both messed up a bit emotionally and physically. Don't get me wrong I love them both, but neither one trust family, believe that two ppl can connect and be happy for long among many other things that for their privacy I can't get into.

Whatever decision is made bout divorce a person needs to make sure 100% that that is what they want and is best.

Em

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""Live life to the fullest!""
 47yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that pv_emerald14 is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Agree with that. However, some ppl choose to get married just to get out of their parents house or because they end up pregnant. Many do it too young and haven't even explored life yet. Not saying that these reasons are good reasons to get married but today these are prob. the top reasons ppl get married.

Em

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""Live life to the fullest!""
 40yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Wyote is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
i dont think people are as willing to work out their problems as they use to be, people have gotten more and more lazy and out of touch with their emotions and as this has happend the divorce rate has gone up. its like "oh wow... we have some heavy conflicting interests/emotions/goals (whatever the case may be) i guess we werent meant for eachother and should call it quits" if your unhappy, there are ways to change things to become happy again... this of course requires effort from BOTH people and if both are not willing to change and put in the effort then yes, divorce is in order.

my apologies for this rant in advance, and again, im young and have little experience with this matter so perhaps im being nieve, but it is how i feel.

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"A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. - Thomas Carlyle"
 57yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Dreamer is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
What if you are unhappy, and have been told repeatedly things won't ever change to make you happy?

Someone controlling another person, in my book, is abuse. And refusing counseling and communication from one will never make the other happy.

Yes, being pregnant does come into heavy consideration.

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"Even though is difficult, I can still dream."
 57yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Dreamer is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
What if you are unhappy, and have been told repeatedly things won't ever change to make you happy?

Someone controlling another person, in my book, is abuse. And refusing counseling and communication from one will never make the other happy.

Yes, being pregnant does come into heavy consideration.

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"Even though is difficult, I can still dream."
 57yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Dreamer is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Indeed, where is the love?

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"Even though is difficult, I can still dream."
Divorce
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