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I'm think I'm losing faith in God.

User Thread
 35yrs • M •
Daverich313 is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
I'm think I'm losing faith in God.
I must warn you,this is very long....

Let me start by introducing myself.My name is Quenton.I'm new to this site an my main purpose of coming here is to find some sort of guidance or inspiration from someone.I want to start by giving you A little info on where I stand on the existence of God.It's very switchy for me,one minute I believe in God,the next minute I start to question his existence.I was brought up in a Baptist Church family(black family,black church).Of course when you are young your parents religion rubs off on you,so I just basically automatically believed in God and prayed at night.As I got older..Around 13 or 14 I started to become less interested in church and the religion thing,but I never came to the conclusion that I didn't believe in God,It just wasnt' really A top concern as a teen.So for a few years I was sort of neutral on God and spirituality until about the past year I started seeking answers after i began to think about life and death and questioning our existence,but this didn't lead me to nothing but confusion and not knowing where to start,with so many different beliefs,religions and idealogies.So,about a few months ago,I just said "I'm going to just pray"Now,I havn't prayed in a long time and I really don't know much about prayer,so I just simpy told God that I wanted to get to know him and build a realtionship with him,but I am confused and lost and need guidence.Not to long after this prayer certain events happened in my life that seemed to be to much of a coincidence,I truley believed that It was God answering my prayer for guidance.After these events I really began to seek God and praying and I really felt good about it,I actually felt A sense of security and confort while going to sleep at night after praying and overall I just felt good emotinally.Things were going really well until recently while I was searching on Youtube for videos to get spiritual advice and guidence,but I found something else...videos from non-believers "Atheist".After listening to some of the things they had to say,I really started to ask myself "Is God just part of our Imagination?" "Is "God" and "heaven"just something we use to have confront and keep hope that there's a gold pot at the end of the rainbow for the good we do on earth?" "Are we in-denial that there is nothing on the other end when we die". I really started to ask myself these questions,and I'm starting to loose faith.I mean I've always said I believed that there has to be "A God" At this point I feel it's the only explanation for our existence,for there to be A ultimate creator that's far more Intelligent and intricate then our human minds could ever imagine.The whole "Evolution" thing and the "Big Bang Theory" It just didn't sell to me.So while I believed In "A God" I just always question the Bible,Jesus religion and all of the so-called spiritual connection that we supposedly have with our God,but this Atheist thing just opened up A entire different area In my mind,now I'm even more confused.It's like In my head God existence doesn't make sense,but In my heart I sort of feel something.So people please give me some type of advice or suggestions,anything to help me come to an understanding.Thank You

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 33yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that MugenNoKarayami is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
I'm having trouble with the title itself, so let me take care of that first before I do or say anything else. From what I gathered, you never really had "faith in God" to begin with, or else you wouldn't be questioning his existence. I think it's more along the lines of 'blind faith' ( don't get me wrong though ) since you were brought up to know what God is, but it seems that you've never been introduced to understand God. A more suiting title, I think, would be more like : "I don't know where to put my faith."

Which leads me to the bulk of my suggestion. It's good that you're getting both sides of this story now, because it makes you ask questions.. and A thinking mind will answer more questions than someone who deems themselves not worthy of knowing the truth.

What seems to be the problem here, you don't understand the concept or essence of what God really is. Now, I can't tell you exactly what that is, it's more of something you have to experience first hand to fully interpret it the way you're used to in your own mind. Do all the reserch you can on the "idea" of God and how you fit in to - all of his work.

Second, would be doing the research of what existence might be- with out a divine creator- by means of scientific or reasonable methods. What this does, I think, is allow you to think- and believe without really giving up something of yours(faith). I really do believe sometimes, myself, that since people have become so consciously awake of themselves the idea of death and what happens from there becomes a frightening thought to most. Especially if nothing else happens.

What you need to do, is inform yourself of both of these sides to the best of your ability, and choose for yourself where your faith should lie. Only you can decide, no one else can tell you what you belive. Because I'm telling you, the further you go down the "rabbit hole" in either direction, one of them is going to hook you.

Maybe if more people decide to reply and give their advice (which is very good 95% of the time)[as a whole] you'll be able to establish some sort of foundation to start your -adventure... haha you'll see what i mean

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"I'm a human being, God Dammit!! My life has value!!!"
[  Edited by MugenNoKarayami at   ]
 49yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Sorceress is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
I absolutely wholeheartedly agree with Mugen here. I am very much like you in that I am constantly confused about whether I believe in God or not. Most of the time I say absolutely, there is no doubt in my mind that God exists and that creation by God is the only logical answer to me because science just still hasn't come up with a better explanation for me yet - but I have doubts I think anybody with faith doubts because that is the nature of faith - faith is the absolute belief in something without the need for physical evidence.

But I love science and cosmolology really interests me because it gets closer and closer to explaning the beginnings of the universe all the time. I have sort of come to a semi-conclusion that both creationists and scientific explanations can pretty much exist together - I believe that God created our existence and set the universe on its course and from that moment of creation (or big bang) if you like the scientists and evolution ideas are probably correct.

But like Mugen says you have to look at as much information as you can and come to your own conclusions.

My biggest conflict of faith comes when I try to logically account for Jesus Christ as the living son of God.
I have a jewish mother and an athiest father and a Catholic husband and everyone has there own conflicting views. For a long time I said its a load of crap you can't possibly believe that a woman just suddenly became pregnant with God's son, it just doesn't make any logical sense, it just can't happen.

Then one day I was asked why I didn't believe in Jesus and when I had explained my feelings I was asked if I believed in God and I said absolutely. The person asked why and I said because I believed the universe was too complex, too fantasticly well designed to have happened by chance - to me it screams of some sort of intelligent design. So then this person asked me 'then you must believe in the miracle of creation.' And that word miracle just did it for me. Absolutely creation is a miracle. And then this person said well you know if you can believe in the most fantastic ,huge, vast miracle of all miracles - the creation of our existence and the universe by an all powerful creator God - then why not the spontaneous and willed impregnation of one woman? If he can create a universe at will, one small human life infused with his own will and spiritual being isn't such a huge task. And that is what made me want to be baptised. A light bulb went on in my mind and I said yes, I believe that. And I had my own personal experience in church one day that just confirmed it for me.

I prayed for some joy in my life because I had just been so unhappy with so much personal struggle in my life and this particular morning, other people prayed for me and this strange feeling came over me. It is very hard to explain but i felt such an overwhelming feeling of joy and love and just started giggling and then laughing (really loud) and I coulndn't stop. I just was completely out of control with laughter and it was a good laughter it wasn't an hysterical mad laughter, it was as if i had seen something funny on the TV and I just couldn't stop and you know how infectious laughter can be, well the whole church was just laughing their heads off, it was the most incredible experience and for the rest of the service I felt at utter peace and contentment and felt like i had been given the biggest hug you can get!

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""Each child holds the world in an open hand to mould it into any shape they choose.""
[  Edited by Sorceress at   ]
 32yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that littlelady89 is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
i also am on both sides of this whole god concept. there are times when i believe and times when i don't. i was raised baptist until i was about seven. i went to sunday school and all that. when i was in 5th grade i found out my brother was gay and my born again chritian grandmother told me that god thought that was evil and my brother was going to hell. that was when i chose not to believe in god. but after i had my beautiful daughter, i started to believe that their had to be a god out there for something so precious to exist. then this past june her father stabbed me twice and he missed my heart my a millimeter and i barely survived. as i was laying on the grass barely surviving i prayed the whole time and i ended up living. so my whole concept on god is that there is definatly some higher power out there, but it's just not the judgemental god that they mention in the bible. i think god is whoever u think he is. i think he wants u to live your life the way u want to and that is why their is free will. and as long as u don't do anything extrememly bad, like murder or rape etc. he will just ignore the petty things that u have done. i just believe in a very open-minded god. but then again it could be just the doctor's that saved my life...

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"free country my ass."
 32yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that her is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Hey, i just went through a very similar thing myself, (decius will know, i tried to debate his smart ass over some islamic follies) and i really was tormented by it, mentally, it made me sick. I started allowing myself to ask questions ive wanted to ask and then i did the whole youtube video thing too, and not just that i started reading more and more and it just blew me, and it wasnt like oh wow, they seem so smart, no it was more like, hey ive always thought that too... but i just never admitted it. I agree with what decius said, i chose logic and rational conclusions over beliefs and it has left me in a very lonely position, and its not a physical thing, i cannot explain it, i feel like im the alien, not them. But only for the moment, i guess i will find people one day who will accept me for who i am, but not yet. The point is, i have no god in my life and im glad, I am more attached and at one with myself than with some imaginary god. So you can choose, your beliefs, and your life will stay the same, or the other path, whats nagging at your mind, and many things will fall for you, bubbles in your mind of security and paradise and the love of jesus will burst with such speed that you wil be left speechless, but its so good at the end., so so so good. so good. or you could do alot of research and find that we are wrong and there is a god and hes going to fry our behinds on judgement day, good luck, feel free to message me if you want, its your choice. so do what i did, its the only advice i can give, ask all sides of the story, ask everyone, read about it, think about it alot, and come to your own conclusion, its hard becaue you dont want to be wrong, i know, i emphasize. and one last thing, i guess i dont know how much this will take over your life but it took over my life for a while in a really unhealthy way, im okay now, im glad, but dont do that to yourself. peace.

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"I have nothing to be proud of today but hopefully tomorrow I will."
 33yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Evol is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
I think people did good at your replies.
I suppose that most, if not all people go through trouble with religion.
I don't want to exactly tell you what you should believe in, because you are you and I am I.
But I mean I guess I can give a suggestion or two.
I'm sorry if I repeat what others have said.
I used to also pray, but I just stopped out of confusion and stuff, I mean, i'm not gona sit around and pray things get better.
If there's something that has no avoidance like a death, then i'm gona enjoy things while I have it, and if there's a problemn, i'm gona try to fix it myself.
If I have an argument, i'm not just gona pray it gets better.
I'm gona stand up and do something.
In this example try to get the arguing to stop, and work things out within my life and maybe the other person's.
But yeah, i would recomend fallowing what Mugan said.
I mean
You don't have to exactly pick a religion either.
Like i've said before, religion may be like rumors, as the story is told things may be put in and left out and even twisted around.
So who's to say that christianity, along with any other religion isn't all false.
Maybe there is God and not the vergin Marry,
maybe there is a heaven, maybe there is a hell, maybe there is nothing after life, or maybe you are born again.
I just quit on it though.
I'm not going to be struggeling through my life over something I will never find out untill >maybe< after death.
So I simply live my life for living.
I go throughout thinking, well whatever happens when I die, happens, I'm gona try to make myself proud by doing what I luv.
"Judgment" may happen when I'm through.

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"I am contradiction"
 69yrs • M •
Ignatius is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
If Zeus doesn't exist is Poseidon still his brother?

What if you were brought up to belive there were two Gods. One that created the world and the one that didn't. The one that created the world is the one you want to mock and the one that didn't is the one you want to pay your respect to. There was such a civilization a long time ago.

Stop wasting time wondering if there is a God or not, because if you had been born in India you would have drabbed the hours away wondering about whether there was a Khrisna or not.

As far as believing goes can you image what it would have been like if you believed that a turtle held up the earth and who is holding up the turtle why another turtle of course and who is holding up that turtle why another....See where this is leading to? If not consider this, You can wonder all your life whether there is a God or not and die before you even know the answer. so just put the idea of whether there is a God or not out of your head.

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 32yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that her is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Is not that easy, if i speak about myself i couldnt because if i made a mistake and ended up being a kaafir(disbeliever), id get forever hell. Its because of what these teachinsg teach us, maybe thats why he's so worried..

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"I have nothing to be proud of today but hopefully tomorrow I will."
 34yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that ChrisD is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Just because you haven't found the answer Ignatius doesn't mean there isn't one.

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"The truth will set you on fire"
 33yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Evol is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.

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"I am contradiction"
 53yrs • F •
Sam356 is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
I am not sure about my faith anymore.

I have always believed in god. When I was a child, I went to church. I thought I saw god sitting across the isle. It sound crazy. But it was like he spoke to me with out talking. I don't know. Always I never worried about faith in god I just had it. I saw him in church.

My husband and I had problems. (He was cheating on me with 22 year old girl.) I turned to god. I was sad a lot. A little on the crazy side. But I knew no matter what happen, God would see me through. It gave me peace in the back of my head. Even at the worst of times, when I found out over and over that he didn't stop talking to her. And final told him I was getting a divorce. I still had faith. I knew that if I was going to take care of my kids, and me I could. I had god to help me make good decision. My husband after I told him I was getting a divorce stop talking to the girl and started to win me back. I still had god. I talk to him and made the decission to take him back. It wasn't easy accepting him back though. But I still had faith in god. Then my sister, and my neice and nephew died last year on March 4th. I just couldn't believe it. My sister who I loved dearly, had a lot of medical issues. I knew she would die some day soon. I could see that I would miss her since I talked to her everyday about my husband. I just didn't know how much it would kill me to lose her. I can even tell you the pain I feel with the loss of my niece and nephew. It's unbelievible. It seem like it was bad at the beginning. I was in bed and unmoving for a couple of days. But it just seems to be getting worse. So I turned to god for help. It seem to help at the beginning. But I just can not understand why the hell, he would take my neice and nephew from me. What the hell is the point? So I started to read the bible. From the beginning of the book, it doesn't make sence. So who helped me through all my hard times? Because the god in the bible would just stoned my husband for his affair. Actually husbands were allowed to cheat on their wives. They were allowed to have many wives. They just couldn't have sex with another man's wife. That's when they would be stoned. To me the Bible just doesn't make any sence. People have told me after seeing the passion of the Christ that they just felt so loved. I saw it. I didn't see it that way. He Jesus is, being wiped and beaten. How is it showing us love? Why would Jesus have to have this happen to him? Why if god is all powerful not already have forgiveness set up? He told Adam and Eve not to eat the forbidden furit. Why didn't he forgive them? If we are expected to forgive, why isn't he?

I like how the explain god in Bruce Almightly. I guess with out reading the bible and just listing to people talk about god this is how I would see him. I nice guy. Trying to let us have free will, but answering prays when he can.

But this isn't the god descride in the bible. So where are we getting Bruce's god from? Are we soften him up so people want to believe in him? Or did they have it wrong in the bible? Where they making him out to be the god they describe to fit the times? If god talked to all those people in the old testimint, why doesn't he talk to us know? (Then again, I thought he talked to me.) I just don't know what to beleive anymore.

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"What is wrong with me?"
 33yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Evol is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Aww =(
i'm sorry for your misfourtunes hun =(
You can speak with me any time if you wish to.
I don't know quite what to say
I'm not one to try to tell you what you should believe in
but I would suggest just trying to focus more on life then religion.
Focus on happyness
though i very well know this can be difficult
Life is life and I try to take it as it comes
no one really knows where it will lead but we live through our days and nights anyways
One day death will come, just try to have it so you've said and done everything you feel needed.

Good luck on everything.
"Move along move along just to make it through"

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"I am contradiction"
 33yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Evol is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.

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"I am contradiction"
 33yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Evol is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
It is your will that got you through life this much =)

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"I am contradiction"
 33yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Evol is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
not necessaraly God
some believe in "him" and still commit suicide
so just live as you want to
be yourself
live free
Take the pain and improve

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"I am contradiction"
I'm think I'm losing faith in God.
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