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You Are Not A Feminist If...

User Thread
 38yrs • F •
You Are Not A Feminist If...
For a long time I have had an aversion to the term feminism. Even now, I take offence if someone were to call me a feminist. I think this aversion has been created in me over time from witnessing the behaviours of so called feminists.

I myself don't like to be categorised with the term, as with it comes baggage and a general cliqueness that I do not subscribe to.

If I were to call myself anything in terms of a label, it would be that I am a 'Humanist' - something that I've made up for myself that much more accurately depicts my position when it comes to inequality. If the scale of inequality were tipped the other way, as in if males were ones who were more oppressed and treated unequally, then I would be arguing for them. (Note: my usage of the term Humanist is not in tune with the current conventional meaning of the term)

But it isn't males that inequality is targeted at, it is females.

I have not studied gender studies at university or read Virginia Wolf and other renowned 'feminists' so my beliefs are not based on another person's observations. They are stemmed from my own intellect, experiences, observations and dissections of the world, people, males, females and male-female interactions/relationships, media, pop culture and knowledge of events, occurrences and psychology and my own life experiences.

So what is the purpose of this post? Perhaps it serves as an introduction for myself, for perhaps the beginning of the dispersion of my thoughts and knowledge about what I believe to be a fundamental problem within the human culture.

It should be noted, that the term feminism, which is supposed to mean 'The advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men' has been bastardized, by the very people who claim to be feminists / pro-feminists.

So this is addressed to people who call themselves feminists fighting for female equality.

You are not a feminist if:

~ You wear make-up/tweeze your brows/remove facial hair/remove bodily hair (eg legs/pubic/underarms) without acknowledging that there exists an inequality in society whereby such activities are deemed 'normal' for women and that this view is incorrect. You are not a feminist if you accept any of these activities as being a 'normal' proponent of being a female.

~ You subscribe to the notion that having longer hair, as opposed to very short 'mens' style hair, is a feminine characteristic. You are not a feminist if you fear having very short hair and don't admit that this is an incorrect fear.

~ You wear high heel shoes, or accept the wearing of high heel shoes by other women, AND believe that this is 'normal' practice / part of being a female.

~ You believe that the contraceptive pill is an acceptable form of birth control.

This might be a growing list, but the above are of the main things that can be used to easily discern people who are actually fighters for female equality from individuals who subscribe to feminism for the sake of identity or something other than creating actual equality.

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"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."
[  Edited by Dawn at   ]
 32yrs • M •
deadcat is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
Don't understand your point about the contraceptive pill not being an acceptable form of birth control. Why not?

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 28yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Sammy K is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Yeah whats wrong with the pill?

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 38yrs • F •
I plan on dedicating a thread to the topic of birth control pills/natural female contraception methods and why it's such a farce that women have been taught to believe BCP is the best option for birth control.

But to answer your question in short, a woman is only fertile for a few days per month when her egg is released and viable. This fertility window is small, and only enlarged by the fact that sperm can survive for upto 7 days, so if sexual intercourse take place 7 days before the egg is released, although on that day the woman is not fertile, sperm can survive up until the time the egg is released. Once it's released the female egg (ova) has a lifespan of only 24 hours (approximate). To take horomone altering pills on a daily basis to oppose fertility that is only present for a few days, at the expense of a woman's health and well being, makes the contraceptive pill a completely unacceptable form of birth control.

There are many side effects of the pill, many of which have not been studied thoroughly enough. Women have and do die from deaths connected to contraceptive pill usage. Taking something that increases a womans risk of death; creates emotional/chemical imbalances; affects ones natural mental state (just to name a few), in order to have sex (which you can do without the pill), and this being socially acceptable is not conducive to liberating women.

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"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."
[  Edited by Dawn at   ]
 50yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ophion Roth is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
So, to summarize, if you want to attract men, you're not a feminist.

Did I understand correctly?

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"Fell through the looking glass and cannot seem to find my way beyond."
 38yrs • F •
No, you did not understand correctly. That is not a summary, it is a misunderstanding.

If a woman decides to wear high heels and makeup to attract a man, that's her choice to make. But there is difference between wearing heels and makeup and knowing within yourself that it is not ideal, nor correct, to have to do these things in order to attract a man, versus doing them based on the belief that such actions are what make an attractive woman.

Real attraction requires no falsehoods - which is the most alluring, most intense and satisfying interactions.

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"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."
 50yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ophion Roth is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Is it inconceivable to you that many women actually love the things you deride?

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"Fell through the looking glass and cannot seem to find my way beyond."
 50yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ophion Roth is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
quote:
to have to do these things in order to attract a man


In order to attract a man. Your language is strange to me.

Why would you not enjoy doing these things to be attractive to a man?

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"Fell through the looking glass and cannot seem to find my way beyond."
 50yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ophion Roth is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
quote:
Real attraction requires no falsehoods


Define real attraction. And why make-up is a falsehood, rather than an expression of desire.

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"Fell through the looking glass and cannot seem to find my way beyond."
 32yrs • M •
deadcat is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
Make up covers up some ones true complexion in an attempt to "hide" blemishes and imperfections...

Why would a woman not enjoy doing oppressive things to themselves in order to attract men? Because it oppresses them.

Enjoying looking sexy or even slutty because it honestly feels good to the core of a persons soul, and looking sexy or slutty because you feel like you have to, even if you don't want to, in order to be noticed by men are two different things.

I'm just puzzled by you here because in another thread you talk about your contempt for women and their inability to be a real true woman, but here you promote some kind of ignorance towards woman and their struggles with sexual oppression...

Perhaps you don't view being made to feel inadequate unless conforming to mainstream sexuality isn't oppressive.

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 50yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ophion Roth is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
By definition make-up covers the biological complexion. That's just stating the obvious. It's a mask. Who would deny it?

In the same way as painting a tiger onto a child's face is a mask. In the same way tribes people make themselves up for a variety of festivals and events. In the same way as actors portray different facets of themselves by using it.

By using words like oppression, you disallow the fun that can be had with it.

And by separating those women that enjoy it and those that feel oppressed by it, you take a niche situation and try to project it as a problem for all. Which is why this kind of rhetoric always comes across as mean-spirited and puritanical.

WHO is oppressing these women? Ultimately it is themselves. Because they feel insecure with what should just be a simple life choice, and whinge to the rest of us that they should be seen as beautiful in their own right.

Who would argue with that?

Men like both, believe it or not. With make-up and without. It is the way it allows for all the different facets of a woman's character to come forth.

And my other thread was not about contempt for women (can't you see how deflective that kind of statement is? Aren't you interested in uncovering truths rather than gainsaying?) It was about my contempt for western women.

Your last sentence was indecipherable, so I cannot yet comment on whatever it was you meant.

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"Fell through the looking glass and cannot seem to find my way beyond."
 50yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ophion Roth is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
And if, as a woman, you are not comfortable attracting a man, maybe nature is trying to phase your particular genetic strain out.

Because, like it or not, beauty is the impetus for creation.

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"Fell through the looking glass and cannot seem to find my way beyond."
 50yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ophion Roth is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Inner beauty, for those with souls to feel it, AND outer beauty.

And the two should have a direct link.

But by using the rhetoric of oppression, something is obviously not right with these women. There are issues they have personally, which they are trying to foist onto the rest of us as a problem we all share.

Which we do not.

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"Fell through the looking glass and cannot seem to find my way beyond."
 50yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ophion Roth is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
And, also, it is not up to women to decide what a man may or may not find attractive about them.

So there's actually no argument, feminist or otherwise.

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"Fell through the looking glass and cannot seem to find my way beyond."
 38yrs • F •
quote:
Enjoying looking sexy or even slutty because it honestly feels good to the core of a persons soul, and looking sexy or slutty because you feel like you have to, even if you don't want to, in order to be noticed by men are two different things.

You have a good point and the way I would put it is that if a woman, or a man for that matter, feels applying makeup and dressing a particular way is a true expression or extension of their soul, then that is completely acceptable and I don't see anything wrong with that. But putting making up on and dressing a particular way because you reject who you are without those things, then that is not right and very unhealthy.

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"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."
You Are Not A Feminist If...
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