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Have you achieved a sense of fulfillment?

User Thread
 35yrs • F
A CTL of 1 means that vigil is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Have you achieved a sense of fulfillment?
I've recently finished reading a book written by Sir Ken Robinson called "The Element".

"The element is what he identifies as the point where the activities individuals enjoy and are naturally good at come together.....the point at which natural talent meets personal passion."

It brought me to wondering about all of the other people in my life whom I know, who are unsatisfied with their current circumstance in life and don't at all seem fulfilled by their work in any way whatsoever.

And so it makes me wonder.

Do you know what you are passionate about?

And with whatever it is that you are doing, do you feel that what you currently do with your life gives you a great overall sense of fulfillment and purpose? Are you using your passions and abilities to their fullest extent?

Or are you currently unsure about it all?

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 35yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that awakendwraith is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
I am passionate about a few things. I am passionate about identifying atheist ideals and beliefs. I work hard on personal philosophies and truth seeking and hopoe that one day I can help unify a great people. I feel like I am doing a good job and I know that my part is small, but I will do all I can.

I am passionate about my own philosophies and I try my hardest to make sure that they are good for me and help me be a happier person. I feel that I am doing a good job at this.

I am passionate about my relationship and getting to know my lover. We make each other very happy and I am continuously exploring the ins and outs of life with her.

This is my work. This is my fulfillment. I hope to be a social studies teacher one day. A published author and a published musician. But I do not consider those things my work right now. Maybe I will one day.

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"Why cry for those that often cry? Instead, help them smile, and smile for those that smile."
 42yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that pupa ria is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
i am never fullfilled with what i do, thats what keeps me going on, till i find that peak orgasm. finding fullfilment in a glimpse of an eye or a snap of a finger seems to me too fantastical...art needs engagement and work. i am what i say, i am what i do, iv'e been drawing and singing since i was a child so it is useless if i question myself, i just know that i need to work on myself...it is not a passion, it is a duty...i feel that it is the only use of my existence...there are many people i could be but i chosed this and it's enough of a proof to let me know what i need to be spending my life on. but you never know how life changes things, so i never take anything for granted.
fullfilment...it only comes with love, love in what you are doing even if its an obligation...society goes so like it...you need to find the will to invest yourself in what may at first sight seem impersonal to you.

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"I'm the mirror that will make you invisible"
 35yrs • F
A CTL of 1 means that vigil is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
quote:
i am never fullfilled with what i do, thats what keeps me going on, till i find that peak orgasm. finding fullfilment in a glimpse of an eye or a snap of a finger seems to me too fantastical...art needs engagement and work.


Pupa ria,

I understand that, as with anything, we should always be trying to challenge our skills so that we are always discovering new things and learning.

I suppose when I say fulfillment, I am talking about being able to do something that brings you a sense of purpose and joy, something that you feel truly enriches your life. It is not about being satisfied with everything that you set out to do, but about loving what you do and feeling like you are being completely true to who you are.

You say that drawing and singing is what you feel is your duty and the way you talk about it certainly sounds like it is a passion. It's something that you feel like you must do, something you know you need to be spending your life on. It seems to give you a sense of purpose.

Do you feel like you must do these things because you absolutely love doing those things and you'd feel emptier if you weren't doing them?

quote:
fullfilment...it only comes with love, love in what you are doing even if its an obligation...


I agree that loving what you do brings fulfillment. I don't know about loving obligations though, and gaining fulfillment through them. Perhaps your definition of obligation differs from mine?

I see obligation as something that you feel you should do, even if you don't want to do it.
When I feel obligated to do something, I do not gain fulfillment through doing it, but a sense that I have acted responsibly. It probably makes me feel good about who I am if I act responsibly, but it doesn't really make me feel fulfilled. Just like if a single parent felt the obligation to work at a job they didn't enjoy because they need to make ends meet and support their child. They probably feel good about being able to support the child, but it doesn't mean they gain any real fulfillment through the work that they do, which I suppose is the kind of fulfillment I am getting at.


Awakendwraith,

It is so interesting to know what other people are passionate about, so thank you for sharing. I think it is a remarkable thing for anyone to feel that they are living with a sense of fulfillment in what they do, and purpose, being completely true to themselves. Is that what you would say you feel you are doing? I imagine it would feel so liberating. No one I know is currently able to say that about themselves.

What do you believe has aided you in reaching this point? Was there ever a point where you had no idea about what you were passionate about or had a natural talent for? Or have you always kind of had a sense about what you could do and what you wanted to be?

I myself feel at a complete loss about what it is that I should be doing with my life, what it is exactly that would give me that purpose and fulfillment I'm sure everyone is striving for. I truly cannot say for sure what I am passionate about, because I constantly feel as though I spread myself too thinly across too many things. I enjoy everything but seemingly love nothing. I really don't feel like I have a great sense of self because of this. One of my greatest fears is not being able to find an employment that I will be happy with and find truly rewarding. I definitely cannot conceive of one just yet.

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 36yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Jacker_Jones is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Currently I am in school completing a joint major in economics and political science. I have found great reward in what I do although sometimes I don't. Sometimes I try things or different topics in those fields and find no interest at all. Probably because my area of study is so broad.

This summer I worked with a mining company in risk management. I have to admit it is incredibly interesting. Perhaps because I am interested in economics. The way companies deal with the risks and how sometimes they just have to accept the risk and do nothing. I love how it incorporates so much broad knowledge as oppose to specialization. That knowing a little about everything will incorporate better than knowing a lot about a little.

However, I also have a creative side and would like to pursue music. I wish I could do it full time but its been more put aside because of the reality that risk management and school are more realistic areas of work. However, it remains a hobby and one day I would like to work with synthesizers, recording software and drum machines and produce a cd just to say I have done it.

As well I would like to produce a screenplay for a movie. Also just to say I have done it. I have a couple of ideas and usually when I have too much free time on my hands I start working on my screenplay. Its in the works but i figure one day in the next year I will have completed my first work.

All I have to say about passion is that from my experience you really have to get out there and try things. If you don't try something you will never ever find your passion because even if you think you may like something you don't know for sure until you try it. The more you do the more passion can be involved into your life.

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"I love to see people struggling for their purpose in life..."
 35yrs • F
A CTL of 1 means that vigil is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Jacker_Jones,

Would you say that through economics and political science, you have or are on your way to gaining fulfillment? Like gaining it through working in areas similar to risk management?
Do you feel like you are being all that you can be and are expressing all of your talents to a degree that you are truly happy with?

You say you also have a creative side and wish that you could invest in that full time. By not being able to express it as much as you might wish, do you not feel repressed in that way? If it were a realistic area of work, would you pursue it over economics and political science?

It sounds like you love being able to do something that utilizes a broad range of knowledge from yourself, is that accurate? Do you think if you were able to utilize your creative side as well, in a job, would that make any kind of difference? Or would you not be bothered by it either way?

I definitely agree with you when you say that discovering passion comes from trying everything.

I suppose my frustration comes from feeling that I have tried a lot of things that I am interested in, and spent a lot of money studying different areas and still not finding any kind of possible employment that I fully connect with. I feel like I truly need to love or thoroughly enjoy doing something in order to want to keep on doing it for a living. I want to be all that I can be, whatever that is. But it's true that I haven't tried absolutely everything just yet.

Working in customer service isn't at all rewarding to me. I feel that the more time I spend doing it, the more I die inside, as dramatic as that sounds. If I do it any longer, I feel like I am going to go crazy. Leaving the job just doesn't seem viable at the moment though, and I feel like I am just going to get stuck in this loop of needing to work unfulfilled, unrewarding jobs in order to just get by normally.

I am scared and absolutely unhappy about being in this position right now and not being sure of how to deal with it, but I'm determined to remain optimistic about figuring something out though, eventually. There has to be something.

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 35yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that awakendwraith is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
"One of my greatest fears is not being able to find an employment that I will be happy with and find truly rewarding."

There is a reason why everyone fears this. I have feared it myself, but no longer do I. I believe that is because I am no longer looking. Not because I have found something, but because it is no longer important. A job is how I pay my bills, not how I live my life. If you job happens to be how you live your life, and if it happens to make you happy, then good. But I don't think that you should limit yourself to a job being that thing that rewards you in life. At least not the predominant thing.

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"Why cry for those that often cry? Instead, help them smile, and smile for those that smile."
 35yrs • F
A CTL of 1 means that vigil is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
quote:
But I don't think that you should limit yourself to a job being that thing that rewards you in life. At least not the predominant thing.


I can believe some people may be entirely happy working at a job that they do not find very rewarding, and then having their hobbies as the thing that gives them that fulfillment. I think it's excellent if a person can feel that way and be content with it.
I suppose I just don't feel that I'm one of those people. I feel like I will always be unhappy working at a task that does not give me any sense or reward or enjoyment. I want to spend my life, invest my time, in something that I truly believe in and enjoy doing.

It's not at all that I believe that only a good job can give me any sense of reward and fulfillment in my life, but making an income seems to take up so much of our lives that these are the characteristics I personally feel that I need to try to aspire towards when settling on a career.

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 42yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Chained Wings is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
To me the difference between a job and a career is that a job is what you do to pay the bills, but you don't like it. A career is what you do because you like it.

I think we would all love to have a job we couldn't wait to get up in the morning to do. The people who do find their niche are very lucky and they are usually very successful. Because they are driven to do better and to go further by their passion for what they are doing. Whereas, when its just a job, you only give what you have to and no more.

I think what Ken Robinson says about how we are taught to be good workers but have the creativity taken out of us is true.

But then there really isn't allot of room for creative people. Not everyone can be a painter. I mean, who would sweep our streets or build our houses or fix our plumbing?

But the strange thing is, since its so rare to earn a living being creative and it isn't a critical job like being a doctor or scientist is... why do they end up being paid so much money? What does that say about us as a society?

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"When I was a child I flew! Then as an adult- I watched others soar."
 42yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Chained Wings is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
As for me. When I was younger I was a true idealist and wanted to change the world. But I didnt like the idea of being a dictator. I felt just because I believed a certain way was right did not mean it was.

I wanted to lead by example. To be in the spotlight and have people look to me and see my way and follow of their own free will. So I looked at who had the best chance at doing that.

And I saw that the celebrities did. I saw how they influenced young minds and could change ways of thinking so easily and how they were role-models people looked up to and followed.

So I decided to become an actor.

I had such big dreams for this, and for two years I studied my butt off and wrote allot of the material I performed and did allot of short films by the up and coming movie makers of the time.

But after a while I noticed that the industry itself was not what I was about. It was shallow, superficial and totally corrupt. It had no soul.

Eventually I became disillusioned with it all and gave it up.

Who knows if I would have gotten far if I had of stayed with it. I think I would have. I was certainly doing well and truly felt i was going in the right direction. But, I guess, it was not to be.

Since then I have had many jobs, from digging ditches to working in five star restaurants. None of them I found fulfilling. None of them made me unable to sleep at night because I had an idea and couldn't wait to get into work to implement it.

It makes me like 99 percent of people who will only ever just have a job and not a career. And I will never be truly happy with the way I keep a roof over my head.

I guess many years ago, I resigned myself to the realization I will never change the world, nor will I find fulfillment in work.

And the fact I am a very creative person and really only seem to do well and feel passionate with creative type things makes that hard to come to terms with.

I don't think I ever will to be honest.

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"When I was a child I flew! Then as an adult- I watched others soar."
 42yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that pupa ria is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
i understand what you are saying Vigil and maybe my response to this was a quick and easy way out. this sense of purpose and fullfilment is one of my main worries, like you i want a job in which i feel i'm putting the person i am at work in all it's angles. i don't want partial satisfaction, i want it all as they say but with time i'm feeling that it's a little utopic...what you have to do is find a balance. but this doesn't mean to give up on the effort to persevere in who you are.

there's this french singer that say that talent doesn't exist, that talent is the desire of doing something. maybe obligation is not the right word...it gives a sense of pressure and takes the pleasure away. i don't know, just like you i'm trying to find a medium where i could practice all my desires, maybe i wont sing, neither paint, these are all outputs it's source is the need to create. so i sometimes feel sorry for these women who find their sole sense of fullfilment in motherhood, that's the sadest of resolutions if done for the wrong reasons.
we have to compensate with society but in the mean time struggle to maintain our individuality and unicity.

from a personal experience i felt that everything you do, even if you idealy don't consent to it, will teach you, everything, every job is an experience from which you can take something, the important is to always watch yourself living (under the radar)...when it isn't what you want to do and it hasn't anything more to give you, you move on, it's the law of nature. it's all a build up, just be fully aware and understand the decisions you are making. i wish i could express more but this is my limit now cause there are places where i'm at a loss too.

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"I'm the mirror that will make you invisible"
 35yrs • F
A CTL of 1 means that vigil is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
quote:
The people who do find their niche are very lucky and they are usually very successful. Because they are driven to do better and to go further by their passion for what they are doing.


I don't know about how responsible luck is for those kinds of people, but I don't think it accounts for how they got to where they are as much as you might think.

Maybe, as the book (The Element ) suggests, it has more to do with their upbringings and their attitude toward life in general. It proposes that if you have a positive attitude toward life, you are likely to notice more opportunities because you will be more open to things in the outside world.

It also suggests that people who find their passions early on in life, when they are still children, were merely given the correct guidance and encouraged/enabled by adults around them to pursue what they were naturally drawn toward. So knowing their passions allows them to understand better, the kind of employment they need to find in order for them to remain close to what they are passionate about.

quote:
But then there really isn't allot of room for creative people. Not everyone can be a painter. I mean, who would sweep our streets or build our houses or fix our plumbing?


I truly believe that everyone is creative in their own ways. I can't help but agree with Mr Robinson when he says..somewhere, that all professions employ some form of creativity and creative thinking, be it science or math, architecture or building. Even with cleaning, some people actually love to organize and clean things and come up with efficient ways to do it. It all involves creativity. I think it's true what he says, about the way in which we have separated logic and creativity when really they are entwined and feed off of each other.


quote:
I guess many years ago, I resigned myself to the realization I will never change the world, nor will I find fulfillment in work. And the fact I am a very creative person and really only seem to do well and feel passionate with creative type things makes that hard to come to terms with.


You know, it probably sounds very naiive coming from a 21 year old and maybe it is, but I don't think it is ever too late to pursue in some way something you feel passionate about, some kind of employment that you would find fulfilling. It might be difficult to do so, but I definitely do not think it is an impossible thing to attain.

"Life-enhancing things can happen when we take the time to step out of our routines, rethink our paths, and revist the passions we left behind (or never pursued at all) for whatever reason. We can take ourselves in fresh directions at nearly any point in our lives. We have the capacity to discover the element at practically any age."

- Ken Robinson.

I truly believe in this. Even though I haven't found my way yet and I often get scared that somehow I won't, I do essentially believe that I will find whatever it is I am looking for if I keep striving toward finding and attaining it, even if it takes a long time. To me, personal fulfillment and finding my true passion, is something that would be worth the struggle, even if it takes 30 more years of my life to get there.

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 36yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Jacker_Jones is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
The sad thing about life is that really all people who find their niche or get good jobs all originally had either money or a connection.

You need someone on the inside to help open that first door for you. Once that first door is open it opens a tremendous amount of opportunity.

The other option is to build your set of skills. You can do this through education which you will need money for.

The last option is to work your ass off and do things you don't want to do. For instance in Canada there is tremendous opportunity to work up north. It's just that nobody wants to live there because it is miserably cold.

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"I love to see people struggling for their purpose in life..."
 35yrs • F
A CTL of 1 means that vigil is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
I agree.
That's why it's also about education in our early years and why the whole school system needs to undergo a whole transformation.

The argument there is that school was built for the industrial revolution. Now that we have moved way beyond those times, dealing with more climate problems and sickness (obesity, depression), over population and the super fast growing rate of technological advancement, which all generate a more unknown future, we are going to need more highly creative thinkers from all areas and people who are truly tuned into their professions. We need to be able to see new ways of doing things and prepare future generations to uncover and be ready for occupations that might not exist at this point in time.

It's true that there is a hierarchy in schools which shouldn't be there, where academics like science and math are higher on the chain than humanities and arts, even though they are all just as important as each other. But the arts, even in the schools I went to, always got way less funding than academics.

If we were all guided correctly through our education and given the opportunity when young to follow those natural interests since that is what school should be enabling us to do, giving us those opportunities, I'm sure we'd all be a lot more comfortable with where we are sooner in our lives rather than later. We'd have more of an understanding about who we are and what our abilities and passions are, so we'd be able to contribute a lot more to the world, through whatever it is we are doing. Because we'll love what we do.

I feel like I've pretty much been just regurgitating everything I have learnt from Mr Robinson over the past few weeks, but I just feel like it's all so true.

The times, they are a-changin'.

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 42yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that pupa ria is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
you know, i have thaught this through, all you need is some balls and nerves to throw yourself into life whether it was in love or hate. this is so boring, so undicized while you know what you want to be, so why don't you be it? we sell ourselves everyday, but are you selling the right thing? what you are talking about fragile vigil, eveybody see's theirself in you, don't sell other people through you, just sell yourself, it's how it goes."become what you are" and show it to the world.

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"I'm the mirror that will make you invisible"
Have you achieved a sense of fulfillment?
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