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User Thread
 47yrs • F •
Khryseis is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
Closed off
I am a closed off woman. I have had relationships with good men, but they all ended and I now no longer choose to try to get into any serious, committed or loving relationship. The reason being that I know I don't get it. I don't receive whatever affection, warmth or loving thoughts are thrown my way from these men who fall in love with me.

I think many things have happened in my life that I have not come to terms with. It's not that I don't want to engage in a wholesome, healthy relationship. It's more like I just don't know how to. When someone says the words 'I love you' to me, it's like my mind doesn't know what that means. I react to it with nothing. I sometimes wonder if it was my first boyfriend who ruined me when I was a teenager. I don't remember how it felt anymore, but I would say he was the one bad apple on my list of relationships. But then again, what if I was like this before him too? I don't know what it is that I am lacking that makes me this way. I feel like the ice queen doomed to a life by myself.

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 35yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that Geisha is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Perhaps you experienced some trauma as a child? Do you feel appreciated by your parents?

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