13 Thoughts to ponder today

THIRTEEN THOUGHTS TO PONDER TODAY
>
> 13. You should never take life seriously. Nobody
> gets out alive anyway...
>
> 12. Life is sexually transmitted...
>
> 11. "Healthy" is merely the slowest possible rate at
> which one can die...
>
> 10. Men have two emotions: "hungry" and "horny". If
> you see him without an erection make him a
> sandwich...
>
> 9. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day;
> teach a person to use the Internet and they won't
> bother you for weeks...
>
> 8. Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really
> good for anything, but you still can't help but
> smile when you see one tumble down the stairs...
>
> 7. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday,
> lying in hospitals dying of nothing...
>
> 6. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again...
>
> 5. All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
> It pays no attention to criticism...
>
> 4. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two
> hundred dollars but a substantial tax cut only saves
> you thirty cents?
>
> 3. In the 1960s, people took acid to make the world
> weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac
> to make it normal...
>
> 2. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest
> profession, but many have come to realize that it
> bears a very close resemblance to the first...
>
> 1. You read about all these terrorists and most of
> them came here legally, but they hung around on
> these expired visas, some for as long as 10-15
> years. Now, compare that to Blockbuster: when you
> are two days late with a video, those people are all
> over you! I think we should put Blockbuster in
> charge of immigration & Homeland Security....

Em

Man I love them all... especially #1.
I never thought about that before but now that I do it makes perfect sense.

Thanks for sharing 13 thoughts.