Reciprocation

Reciprocation [+ favourites]

Reciprocation “give and take”

One of the most widespread and most basic norm of human culture is embodies in the rule for reciprocation. This rule requires one person to repay, in kind, what another has provided.

I was think this rule is dangerous you are able to manipulate another with them out them even realizing. An example of this was when I decided to cover 10 min if a shifter fro a fellow associate at work. The next week I could not work a 9 hour shift and asked that same associate. Even though they where already working a 6 hour shift they said they would pick up mine.

I did not even realize it but I was using the rules of Reciprocation as a form of manipulation.

""Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth" -oscar wilde"

If you didnt relise what you were doing, how were you manipulating them?

"When I was a child I flew! Then as an adult- I watched others soar."

Can one not be manipulative without intent?

"Truly exceptional people prefer to be on their own because ordinary people are annoying."

That's a wicked post.

To observe one's own behaviour as such is rare.

Did you know he/she had a 6 hour shift and ask them anyways? If you didn't then when you found out, what was your reaction?

Obviously your ten minutes doesn't match his 9 hours, so by the reciprocation thing you have gained an advantage in exchanging opportunity cost with this co-worker.

If you do not wish to manipulate them, then your best interests should be to equate that opportunity cost by somehow paying them back through your own loss of opportunity (free time).

On the other hand, perhaps they would have done the same thing to you, for certain, and you did what you did with that knowledge. Sometimes you have to give yourself that credit and not feel guilty about something that, on the surface, seems cruel.

"Hating everyone protects me from elitism."

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Did you know he/she had a 6 hour shift and ask them anyways? If you didn't then when you found out, what was your reaction?

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"My mind is tearing me apart, then it constructively puts me back together again."

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Did you know he/she had a 6 hour shift and ask them anyways? If you didn't then when you found out, what was your reaction?

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""Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth" -oscar wilde"

Obligation is irrelevant, unless you promised you would cover for them. I prefer to go with something more like:
'There is only choice and the full, clear recognition of a principle obscured by the notion of “duty”'

If you want to reciprocate, do so. That coworker didn't cover your shift without knowing that they were covering for you, and that they may or may not have the favor returned. If you must hold to some "duty", be true to the duty that's your word. Stand behind what you say you will do, not behind some purported social obligation.

"Truly exceptional people prefer to be on their own because ordinary people are annoying."

I like this situation because depending on your relation to your co-worker would define the action.

It seems like taking hours and helping each other out when you need it is a very good way to exercise this reciprocation.

reminds me of "I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine"



the only problem I see when most people do favors for another, is that they are expecting that to be returned. If you can keep it in your mind to not expect something in return, more times than not the person will remember what you did for them and help you any way they can.

there may be an unwritten understanding that if you help someone in need with a sense of selflessness, more times than not, you'll have a helping hand when you need it.

you're only stuck in a cycle when you both start to believe you have to take turns to help each other and keep track of each others good deeds.


I say, you should keep helping him, but at YOUR convenience- and your co-worker should do the same.

"I'm a human being, God Dammit!! My life has value!!!"

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there may be an unwritten understanding that if you help someone in need with a sense of selflessness, more times than not, you'll have a helping hand when you need it.

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"Truly exceptional people prefer to be on their own because ordinary people are annoying."

There is actually another important factor to think about in this situation: the attitude of the co-worker. In order to take advantage of someone that person must be an unwilling tool, used, if you will. If, on the other hand, the person would have helped out willingly even if they had not asked you first then even if you did what you did deliberately, it still would not constitute manipulation because the choice was always the co-workers. Intent on your part is only one factor in this scenario and manipulation may not have come into play at all.

"If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you."

That which you really possess cannot be taken away from you. You can only give it(if you want),but nobody can take it away. That which you don't possess,and by which you are possessed,you can never give-it can only be stolen or taken away,robbed.

That is the beauty of a favour. To be honest, how many of us do favours without expecting reciprocation? Personally speaking, if that favour does not inconvenience me too much, I don't mind doing it 'for free'. But right now, do we speak of favours as a kind of exchange? Then where is the spirit of helping, as favours were intended to portray? Are 'favours' a currency to be traded or bartered?

If we were to calculate our gains and losses even in favours, then it is quite sad. If that colleague got miffed at you, then you could always offer yet another return favour, (Because in this case the colleague calculates 'favour points' and it is only right to play along)

If that colleague doesn't, then I think he doesn't see it as a manipulation. It truly would be a 'favour' then. Loosen up, people are nice. After all, we're the only species capable of it.

"Some men are wise. Others are otherwise."

In our society, it is looked down upon to not return a favor we are taught as infants to not take with out giving back. If I don’t reciprocate I’m going against my moralities of gratitude, decency, responsibility, fairness, equality, and connection.

In my mind these make of the establishment of obligation and going against them is fundamentally wrong am I not?

""Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth" -oscar wilde"

I agree with the above.
But what I questioned was the intention when you do a favour for someone.

"Some men are wise. Others are otherwise."

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But what I questioned was the intention when you do a favour for someone.

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""Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth" -oscar wilde"