Why Teachers Go Crazy!

Why Teachers Go Crazy! [+ favourites]

TEACHER: How old were you on your last birthday?
STUDENT: Seven.
TEACHER: How old will you be on your next birthday?
STUDENT: Nine.
TEACHER: That's impossible.
STUDENT: No, it isn't, Teacher. I'm eight today.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS: George

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WILLY: Me!

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Are you chewing gum?
BILLY: No, I'm Billy Anderson.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

TEACHER: Didn't you promise to behave?
STUDENT: Yes, Sir.
TEACHER: And didn't I promise to punish you if you didn't?
STUDENT: Yes, Sir, but since I broke my promise, I don't expect you to keep yours.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

HAROLD: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn't do?
TEACHER: Of course not.
HAROLD: Good, because I didn't do my homework.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

TEACHER: Why are you late?
WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

TEACHER: I hope I didn't see you looking at Don's paper.
JOHN: I hope you didn't either.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

GARY: I don't think I deserve a zero on this test.
TEACHER: I agree, but it's the lowest mark I can give you.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

MOTHER: Why did you get such a low mark on that test?
JUNIOR: Because of absence.
MOTHER: You mean you were absent on the day of the test?
JUNIOR: No, but the kid who sits next to me was.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
SYLVIA: Your name on this report card.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

TEACHER: Well, at least there's one thing I can say about your son.
FATHER: What's that?
TEACHER: With grades like these, he couldn't be cheating.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

TEACHER: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake.
SAMMY: You can't fool me, Teacher... snakes don't have feet.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"

HYGIENE TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
JOSE: Don't bite any.

"In the sea of ilutions and frustations that life is, some swim and some drown"