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Friends or Not?

User Thread
 38yrs • F •
flitwick is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
Friends or Not?
I have a guy friend, and we tried being something more, but it didn't work considering we both have a fear of commitment. We are still very much attracted to each other, and are contomplating sex! Is this a good idea to get out sexual desires for one another but without the relationship? Let me know!!!

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 46yrs • M
A CTL of 1 means that Ironwood is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Depending on your personal views from sex, but I'd just say that like anything else there is a 50-50 chance of things going smoothly, at best.

Find out if either of you are jealous types, with histories of strong posessiveness, then verbally and respectfully lay your rules and boundries.

You can't know how either of you will react for certain, but if the act under the specified circumstances isn't going to cause either of you undo grief or guilt you should be fine.

Always be clear before and after of where you two stand with eachother, respectfully. This all goes for him of course too.

Without boundaries though, its just far more likely to end up an emotional mess.

One problem you may have judging from your post is the difference between being attracted (emotionally? physically? both?) is if its just a fear of commitment and emotional attraction exists, then it is almost guaranteed to get messy or into a relationship.

If its purely physical on both parts, you might be ok.

Generally only really mellow people or very flighty people can get away without too much emotional entanglement, as long as there aren't any mixed signals of course.

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"The Greatest Enemy of Knowledge is Not Ignorance, It is the ILLUSION of Knowledge. Stephen Hawking"
 40yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Wyote is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
it just depends on morals and personal experience. since you are friends it will change some aspects of the relationship no matter how its handled.

sounds like you are both interested in pursuing it so my personal advice is to just run with it and see where it goes... but be prepared for any sort of consequences of course.

im so vague, my apologies in advance.

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"A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. - Thomas Carlyle"
 37yrs • F •
lil_jj is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
i have this friend she only is nice to me when my other friend isn't around i dont no wat to do my friend says she said something that she didn't cuz when i ask her she says no i didn't say that ! im confused

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"i hate life"
 38yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that 730 is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
^^have a conversation and see who's telling the truth and see who's lying....that's the only way you'll really know..

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"Being is not knowing!"
Friends or Not?
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