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Dear you,
I'm writing you to tell you a story. A story which, if understood correctly, won't be a tragedy or a comedy. There once was a soul, lost inside of a human being but somehow it was united with the heart inside of this person and from then on, it used that physical being to explore this world and meet other souls that had done the same. Afterall, abstractly, we are all souls bound inside of physical entities, yes? And it came across many souls, some of which it saw as family, as friends, as co-workers, and from time to time it began to share other attractions to a few that it couldn't quite understand but that made it vibrant and glowing. Out of pure caution, it kept a distance just to be safe, an instance in which God had offered one hand of water and the other of fiery hell - and to jump quickly into the palm of water could quickly turn into fire. My soul came across yours, and was deeply intrigued by its existence. It shared its moments of love, of joy, of curiosity and all with yours, but it has come to realize that your soul may not be what it could unite with..for us to become soulmates, the true union and definition of love. We share a bond that cannot be beyond a friendship, for my soul wasn't a puzzle piece meant to be placed with yours because the edges simply won't fit.
I cannot do anything but accept responsibility for what my soul had hoped was a union - and perhaps, you may feel a sense of betrayal and deceit because of the pure trial and error involved in its journeys with souls that cannot be at first-hand feel like family, friends, or co-workers. We fit partially, but it would be wrong of me to let my inner soul force us to be completely one when I have come to realize that we weren't meant to be that way. This in itself is a realization, it is something that I must confess out of the pure honesty that we have been sharing between us. Souls are not permanently figured in one way or another, but after much time and conflict, I have come to know that I cannot unite mine with yours - as much as yours may be able, with mine. And it wouldn't be fair or just to let you continue in your pursuit, when I have simply stopped.
I'm not writing this to tell you I've found someone else. I haven't. But my soul must go on, and so must yours, to find ourselves each another that will fit more perfectly to become soulmates and together experience the chaos and turbulence of this terrible but beautiful life, this mosaic world. Magnetic souls we each are, such attraction may be present, but its strength is not enough for me to continue to lead you on thinking that in time I would ever be able to increase the attraction that has already set its limits - regardless of if I tried. If I tried, it would be out of dear sacrifice and not of my own happiness, and in time you would realize this as well and our relationship would be based solely on forcing two pieces that weren't meant to be united.
Love, the idea of soulmates and altruistic selflessness for the one you come to undconditionally care for, is a terrible and painful process. The searching being the worst of the entire pursuit. Some, over time and experience, take the hurt better than others. I'm not sure how you will, and I won't leave you behind without making you realize that just because we weren't meant to be more than a beautiful and close friendship, we must end everything. We won't. I want to talk to you more about this, about how I came to this realization and how you feel. I can't just leave you behind, or end this without an understanding closure that it is not that you are a universally unloveable or replaceable person - you just weren't meant for me, nor I, for you.
You just weren't meant for me, nor I, for you.
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Maha
"Milk, almonds and pistachios."
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