Submissiveness & Subservience

Submissiveness & Subservience [+ favourites]

My partner and I are having a debate and I'm curious to hear your thoughts on it. Do you think that submissiveness and subservience is a sign of weakness?

"Love everyone, question everything and look up!"

Well, it depends... if you're talking in a purely sexual manner, then no... because the dominant and submissive people are symbiotic... so although one literally does have power, they would be powerless if the submissive person did not choose to be submissive.

But in real life, I personally believe that submissiveness (although not necessarily a sign of weakness) is not a positive trait to have. And generally I would say it points to insecurity, confidence issues, and a variety of other things that can get you in trouble.

Sexually it's very different because almost everyone likes to either be dominated or dominate... probably due to their upbringing. If you had a strong father/mother, you will seek that sexually, and vice versa.

"Hating everyone protects me from elitism."

Thanks Decius for your feedback. I should have clarified that I was referring to life in general. In relationships there has to be a give and take in terms of points of views expressed and concessions made in order to determine the best course of action for the relationship. But sometimes there are circumstances where a couple is butting heads and neither individual is willing, or perhaps able due to programming, to submit to the other's beliefs. It is more in reference to situations like that where my partner is of the opinion that someone has to be the 'ultimate ruler'.

"Love everyone, question everything and look up!"

Submission is a good thing if you know what your doing. Like being submissive to your boss if you wanna keep your job.

"Durch Nacht und Blut das Licht"

if you are too submissive in the work place your co-workers will take advantage of you very quickly. being the aggressor gets you higher up on the totem pole faster anyway...

personally, i think you get more out of life being the agressor, but knowing your limits and when to back off is definately key.

"its a dog eat dog world"

"I am Akba-Atatdia"

Ultimate ruler...

Having a leader keeps a group organized and secure, but in terms of a couple....that's a tough one. Decisions will lie in the hands of the leading partner, which may or may not please the other. Having one partner dominate the other may be a way of getting issues resolved without too much hassle. So subservience may not always be a sign of weakness.

"How can we be just in a world without mercy and merciful in a world without justice?"