Hmmmm when is it o.k.?? I think farts are funnier than SHIT.
BUT.....we need to have that type of "relationship" first if you know what i'm saying.
Here are some of my thoughts of flatuation: (that's how you spell it right??)
Let me hear the toot.... you should smell it before I... so when I see that look on your face, I shall run.
Please don't fart when i'm eating. The smell of death & rotton eggs while I am eating will REALLY ruin my appetite. (and piss me off)
Don't fart in bed and then pull the covers over my head. (We shall fight the rest of the night) Kindly get up.... bend your ass in my bathroom, let it go... (it shall echo if it's a big one), then turn on my fan and spray while we laugh our asses off.
If you just asked me to dance.....don't fart please. What's this with guys and doing the "dance fart?"
If you are running past me.... feel free to fart with every step... running farts are the funniest. (and tend to leave quickly in the wind)
Do NOT fart if someone (mainly me, hehehe) is walking in back of you. The smell shall leave a trail, like a tail. I shall embarrass you my stating in a quite loud voice " OMG WHAT is that nasty smell???" "Someone needs to change their pants or something!"
Feel free to fart in the pool. Tell me first so we can laugh at the bubbles.
Do NOT fart while we are taking a bath together..... when the bubble gets to the top it tends to pop, therefore releasing a nasty ass wet shit smell. Us in the tub is romantic... why ruin it?
Feel free to fart in my car or truck. DO lift your ass first please and tell me so we can open the windows. EXPECIALLY lift your ass in my car. I turned on the seat heater in my car.... only to smell a nasty ass smell. My x farted obvously in the seat, and it lingered in the leather. The heat made some type of chemical reaction... therefore in a wierd type of way...... stained the seat of stank. BARF.
If you would like to light a fart in my presence PLEASE DO SO!!! I have yet to see what I hear is like an explosion. Like the spraying of hairspray on a flame. I'd do it myself.... but I have heard war stories about actually burning the ass area. (you can do it with clothes on right?)
Ummmmmm if you like a girl, do not fart in front of her unless you have discussed farting already, and know of her views. I have seen many a guy shot down due to fartage without discussion.
Just some random thoughts.
Take it or leave it....