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Was I Right? (Relationship Problem)

User Thread
 35yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that Dugbug is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Was I Right? (Relationship Problem)
I have a problem that I was wondering if you can tell me what I did was right or not.

I had a girlfriend for 6 months and some weeks. We had gotten far in our relationship and I did a lot of things for her, well as much as I could for my age. I went all out for her, all sappy sad things for her, because I seemed to feel differently towards this girl then any other I knew. We got to a point where we would say to each other that we loved the other and that we didn't wanna leave each other and that life without the other was just unright. Well one night I came online and saw my girlfriend and said hey, we got talking like usual and she told me that there was a problem. One of the people she played tennis with told her they liked her. I was ok with this until she told me that she kinda liked him to, this frightened me because I loved her and I didn't want to lose her. So she said that it was nothing and it would all go away soon. Well a week later she tells me that it didn't go away and that she might want a break to see if we were really right for each other, and to see if she really did like this guy. I told her I didn't like the idea because I thought she might leave me. She understood and said ok, well we will see how it goes. Well a couple days later we got into an argument and the next day when we were in school she seemed angered at me. I appologized because it was my fault and she didn't do anything. Well for the next few days I noticed when I kissed her and talked to her she seemed mad at me. Well I asked her what was wrong and she told me that she wanted a break. Well I thought the break was a good idea to calm her down. Yet, when she told me that she'd be going out with this guy from tennis I got scared again. Yet I wanted her to be happy and she reassured me that she would be back with me, which I was shaky on because she lied about not leaving me ever, so I agreed and let her go on her way for the two weeks she said it would take. Well 3 days later she told me she wanted to come back to me, and I was happy and I told her that the next day that she should come over and we could make up for the time we missed (really I had a suprise for her that involved something from our past, present, and a something I thought would be in the future). So the day comes and she ends up canceling 30 mins before she was to come over (she usually does this because she wants to go play tennis, I don't mind). Well the next day in school I went to go give her an "I missed you" kiss and she said no. I asked her why I couldn't kiss her and she told me she didn't tell the guy yet. Well I got angry at her and told her that she had to tell him because I thought she was trying to play us or something, well she seemed to get mad at me for it and she went back to wanting a break. Well as the 2 weeks passed my friends and her friends heard about what was going on and a lot of people told me to forget about her because I didn't deserve it. I didn't listen to anyone because I knew they didn't know or love her like I did, and I stayed true to her. Well at the end of about 2 weeks of her being away from me, she tells me she wants me back again. I got happy and knew this time I wasn't going to piss her off, and this time I didn't in fact, I did a lot for her yet she wasn't happy for like 3 day, during this time she still didn't tell him. I asked her what was wrong and she told me that she didn't know who she wanted to be with. It was confusing her and it was upseting her. So I thought and asked her what makes her happy. She said to me that just not being confused and stuff makes her happy. So I did something that was in the back of my head, that I was thinking about doing but def. didn't want to. I thought, I love this girl, more then anything I know, and I have to make her happy, so I had to do what makes her happy, and not what would make me happy. I told her to not come back to me. I told her that i'd rather have her be happy then me, and that is what happened. So my big question is, Do you think what I did was a good move?

(Sorry for that being so long and stuff but when I started typing this it was 10 mins after I just told her. So I am kinda using this as a way to get over it.)
Any responce would be good. No matter what it is.

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"If the opposite of Pro is Con, then is the opposite of Progress, Congress?"
 40yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that §hÄDÉ is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
Dude, I hear where you're coming from, But it only gets harder as you get older.
Okay as far as my age goes and my Huge amount of Expiernece this as much as I can figure out:
Break- "Getting tired of you"
up- "your time is up"
Put the two together and you get
Break Up- "Getting tired of you your time is up"

Or as yoda would say:
" Break lead to Break up, Break up lead to her getting a new guy, Her getting new guy makes you feel Miserable for awhile."
But Remember In Relationships it just can't be a one way thing.

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"I'm afraid of the dark,and suspicious of the light"
 48yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that brann22 is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
YES, you did the right thing!!!! You seem careing and she really doesnt deserve you. She needs to go on with life and not keep running back.
Go on with you life. You are 14 and you have a lot of girls ahead of you!
Live Life and Have fun!!!

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"Why try so hard to fit in when you were born to stand out!!"
 38yrs • M •
A CTL of 1 means that KrazyGamer is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
man...that sucks. sorry.

but yeah, you did the right thing. i think if you're with someone, you should be content with who you're with, not eyeing other people. if i were you, i'd feel like she was just using me as a stepping stone, or just as a diversion. forget her.

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"ablahblahblah."
 38yrs • F •
pimpnentez is new to Captain Cynic and has less than 15 posts. New members have certain restrictions and must fill in CAPTCHAs to use various parts of the site.
I have a question........I was just with this guy and we werent officially together but we were messing around and the phisical attraction was definitly there and there was also a little emotional bond between us too but mostly from my part, well i came and brought this guy a card for his birthday and planned to stay with him the day before , well he had a whole bunch of friends over and i was cool with that and the way he acts macho in front of his friends and doesnt talk to me much,but he actually ened up holding hands with this not so attractive girl and brought her up to his room.......right in front of me, and when I left he acted hella mad? What should I do?

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"you learn and you live get by without any kids"
 36yrs • F •
A CTL of 1 means that secret07 is a contributing member of Captain Cynic.
in my experience, which isnt much, phisical attraction does not garentee any commitment. many times a guy will like u when ur there, but as soon as ur not, or there r other girls, he forgets u. theres not really anything wrong with that. after all, he never commited to anything, and probably doesnt even really think about it.

as to the other girl not being attractive i hav come to find that perhaps obvious beauty isnt really as important as most girls think it is. being a girl myself, i obviously dont know too much on the subject.

anyways, my advise would to not let it get to u, and dont do anything with a guy that ur going to regret if he ignores u later.

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"life sucks but its better than the alternative"
Was I Right? (Relationship Problem)
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