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| <<<>>> |
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A Parental Curse |
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| Created by Decius at
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You may constantly complain that your parents did not encourage you enough and even tell them to their faces that many of the insecurities bred in you are a result of their lack of encouragement and support.
You may live your life achieving certain goals that you believed were un-atainable specifically because you felt those that should have believed you could do it, didn't.
It may be necessary to prove these insecurities wrong by proving that those people whom you love and whom love you were also wrong. For them to be wrong, the insecurities they placed on you are also wrong.
But until those goals are achieved, there is a possibility that they are right, and due to your own insecurities you cannot will yourself to believe they are wrong. That is the unfortunate nature of insecurity.
So then, the question is, what is the nature of these insecurities that have been bred in you. Why is it that people who love you difinitively would act in a way that could potentially ruin portions of your life.
The core result of insecurities brought upon by lack of parental support is a feeling of isolation.
During these times, one has learnt to rely solely on themselves, specifically because those who should be loving and caring the most cannot be leaned on for support.
The very fact that these are supposed to be your spiritual pillars is what makes these moments so eternally empty and abusive.
As a result, the dependancy on pure emotional independance enters one's nature. Coupled with this independance is a contradictory need to receive the emotional support that was lacking during those needy times.
The final product of these two opposites is a person that tends to desire emotional support on a constant basis from friends and family, but is also unable to accept it once delivered. This lack of acceptance is due to a lack of trust in others' intentions.
"If those that love me and know me the most don't believe in me, how could anyone else possibly believe in me genuinely?"
The result of this unfortunate state of affairs is, ironically but predictably, the exact reason one's parents treated them with the level of diss-respect that they did.
Those that attempt to provide you with support and love (and who genuinely do love and care for you) grow insecure in their love due to your miss-trust. You, in essence, breed the same insecurities you are attempting to diss-engage from in those that love you.
Not only does this miss-trust in others' intentions apply itself to their love to you, but many actions these people do will hurt you for reasons that seem infantile, but you react massively to them.
The reasoning?
Insecurities have a self-sustaining nature about themselves: They tend to prolong their lives as long as possible.
A true victim of such an ordeal actually enjoys and tastes the bittersweet relief of betrayal.
A person like this will look into every crevice and moment in a relationship and dissect it in order to exploit any possible weaknesses on the other person's part. These weaknesses are used as "feed" for your insecurities about people's love and support of you.
Generally, people in this state of mind actually feel dis-comfort in healthy relationships where there is nothing to complain about. The insecurities from within almost paint a surreal picture of falseness, and it is almost impossible to accept a loving, accepting individual as the real thing.
Such problems can be solved with communication and awareness. Specifically with one's parents or close loved ones.
As the years progress and the media depicts movies and shows with little parental influence, people tend to give less and less importance to the relationship one has with their parents.
There is always betrayal in the world, but there are also people exactly like you, because you exist, and so there is a "formula" in existance that equates to who you are.
The relationship one has with parents is the most meaningful and pivotal relationship they will ever have. This will supercede your spouse, children, or friends.
The blasphemous word "EGO" is something that deters many people from true emotional peace.
The begining and end to any emotional distress is awareness of the problem, and never forgetting it. Things just seem to always fix themselves once that happens. It's a gift every one of us is born with: The need to be happy, and a sub-conscious mind to aid us on our way.
Never forget the awareness that you are insecure, and what needs you have to defy this insecurity. If always in your mind, life will slowly but surely improve. |
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| Created by Decius at
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