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| <<<>>> |
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Pride |
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| Created by Decius at
| [+ favourites]
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My memories, my thoughts and dark emotions are most often brought about by music. This is because the darkest of the dark memories that I have suffered in my time have been coped with music. Music plays an important integral part in my life. It vents emotions. It catalyzes the passing of betrayal, of dissapointment, of loss... all things that require one thing we have no control over... time.
So, aware as we are that time has to pass before we find ourselves in our reflection again, we find methods of helping the time pass. I eat / drink / inhale music. Songs are timestamps of eras in my life.
In my natural state, I will listen to a dark piece that held some value to me... and in front of others it won't often affect me. But when I resume my lone place, sometimes, I will sit and smile as I remember my visage... my mind... my heart.
I will smile, because I found myself again. I will smile because I was victorious. I will smile again because I was vulnerable... innocent. And the fact that the memory makes me love myself even more is indicative that I didn't let my suffering alter me.
It is difficult to achieve this, and I am proud that I have. Everyone suffers. No one ever suffers more than anyone else. Ever. Some continue to suffer. Some now smile.
Songs in anger and sadness... confusion and rejection. All beautiful to me now. Beautiful. Gorgeous. I am filled with an eclectic joy at the thought of the suffering. They are mine.
They are exactly that...
My miseries. My proud moments of solitude. And no one can have them. |
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| Created by Decius at
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